PERMISSION TO STOP THE ‘SHOULD’S + THE OVERTHINKING
Your baby isn’t the problem. The sleep training industry is.
Attachment-focused sleep support for parents who already know that sleep training is not for them - who are ready to reconnect to their instincts, and stop feeling like they're failing.
HEY, I’M KATIE
The mum friend who you can trust to hear you & hold you through the toughest of sleepless spells. Who knows first hand how torturous the sleep deprivation feels - and who can share real, honest, evidence based + nervous system informed advice to help you get through it (think practical, actionable advice, with a healthy bit of ‘woo’).
Who is here to help you get more sleep - whilst supporting you to continue responding to your little one’s needs.
And who will never, ever tell you that you need to leave your little one to cry in order to “teach” them something.
My little boy never loved to sleep… I spent an unimaginable number of hours searching for answers, desperately trying to figure out WHY he was waking every 20 minutes (like… literal torture!?)
But I couldn’t seem to find any real answers. Only people telling me to leave him to cry so he could figure things out for himself. And I just knew in my bones that no matter how bad things were, this just wasn’t something I could do, or that felt ‘right’.
So when I started to come out of the other side of the dark, sleep-deprived tunnel, I knew I just HAD to deepen & solidify the knowledge I’d gained by training to help others in this situation.
So here I am…!
Somewhere along the way, someone convinced you that your baby needing you was a problem.
But it wasn't. And it still isn't.
You've probably been told your baby needs to be "taught" to sleep. That responding to them too much creates bad habits. That if you're still holding them, feeding them to sleep, or up in the night at 8 months, 18 months, 2 years that you're doing something wrong.
You're not.
Sleep isn't a behaviour to correct. It's a biological process. Often a reflection of how everything else is going: how comfortable they are - how much is changing in their boies and brains - their own sense of safety. When it's not happening easily, it is NOT a behaviour problem. It’s often a sign that a baby is doing exactly what a baby should be doing. But sometimes it’s a signal that we can listen to and learn from.
My Approach
Most sleep support starts and ends in the same place: your baby's behaviour. What they're doing ‘wrong’, and how to stop them doing it.
But that’s not how I see things.
I start with the view that your child is a wonderful, complete, UNIQUE human - who deserves to be seen as such. And the very first step is refocusing and shifting the perspective.
01 / UNDERSTANDING YOUR CHILD
Whatever age they are, you are in relationship with your child. So my approach is deeply rooted in respecting them and their unique needs - and yours! Understanding who they actually are: their temperament, their particular challenges, what winds them up and what settles them. So you can understand how to work WITH, rather than fighting against them.
04 / THE BASICS
Of course we will also take a look at your routines, wake windows, timings, environment to see if any tweaks could be made to support.
Yes, this is important, but it’s often not going to tell us the whole story!
02 / LOOKING AFTER YOU
A huge piece of this is around education: understanding what is truly normal and expected from a child at each age and stage of development (rather than what the sleep training world tells us we should be seeing) can help to lift a weight off your shoulders and release some anxiety and stress. Here, we start questioning the ‘shoulds’, shutting out the harmful noise, quitting the tracking and obsessing and second guessing so you can relax into your role and focus on the baby in-front of you.
Looking after yourself IS looking after your baby. Your rest, your energy, your wellbeing. A regulated, resourced parent is one of the biggest things that helps a child feel safe + settled.
03 / SIGNPOSTING FOR FURTHER SUPPORT
Feeding challenges, discomfort, "colic," sensory challenges, real distress... Often these things can get waved away instead of investigated, so knowing who to turn to and how to advocate for yourself and your baby is really key. (whilst I am never able to diagnose, I can help you to understand which next steps may be supportive)
YOU DON’T WANT TO LET THEM CRY-IT-OUT - BUT YOU DON’T HAVE TO JUST WAIT-IT-OUT
Get some Support
MY HOPE FOR YOU IS…
Less feeling like you're getting it all wrong. More trust. More enjoyment. More of actually knowing your own child.
As a new parent, it's almost impossible not to be bombarded by advice that makes you feel like you're failing. That your tiny new person needs to be taught how to sleep. That routines and schedules are non-negotiable. That you mustn't create "bad habits." As if being responsible for a whole new human being wasn't stressful enough.
My own mental health hit an all-time low in the eighteen months after becoming a mum, and my son's sleep was a huge part of that. Which is exactly why I care so much about telling the truth about infant sleep. Not the sanitised, comfortable, sellable version, but the real, often confronting one.
So much of what I do isn't about analysing your sleep diary and rewriting your bedtime routines (though yes, we'll do that too!) It's realigning what you expect with what's actually biologically and developmentally normal, rather than what's convenient. It’s understanding your child's temperament and working with it, not against it. It’s giving you permission to do the things that make your life easier right now, without fearing you're storing up problems for later.
Because our babies and children’s sleep is ultimately out of your control. But many things that impact on it are within your control: nourishing your body, protecting your energy, supporting your own nervous system.
Looking after yourself is looking after your baby.
I know that's easier said than done when you're running on empty, so my aim is not to guilt or shame or give you ‘one more thing to fail at.’ I’m here to educate and support and guide you to see how it can be possible and where things can change. To know that the teeny changes really do add up. A better breakfast. Ten minutes outside. One thing taken off your plate.
I'm not going to sit here and tell you the sleepless nights aren't hard as F. They are. But feeling like you're failing your baby on top of it makes everything harder than it needs to be.
So let's find the middle ground. Let's look at what's actually going on for your family, and work out together how to make things feel more possible. Without sleep training.
TESTIMONIALS
Parents like you are saying…
LIZ, MUM TO 6 MONTH OLD IN LONDON.
“Through Katie’s support both me and my baby are sleeping better and mine and my husband’s evenings feel far less stressful! Katie helped me to push bedtime with my co-sleeping baby back so evenings are less time-pressured, drop a daytime nap, have her sleep in longer, and also let go of so many ideas around what I ‘should’ be doing. When you’re in the thick of the sleep-deprived haze, having an expert supporting you is invaluable!! Katie is full is wisdom and has a lot of personal experience. She’s so warm and caring and works with you to find the best solutions for your family.”
SUS, MUM TO 2 YEAR OLD IN BATH
“Katie has a very gentle, nurturing approach. She eased my worries and supporting me to trust my gut, and not to listen to the ‘noise’. We followed her tips and guidance and very quickly were all getting much more sleep, without any need for cry it out / stressful bedtime situations.
Katie was so reassuring too, which as an anxious mother was well received. Katie has first hand experience and knowledge and is truly wonderful.”
ELEANOR, MUM TO 8 MONTH OLD IN BRISTOL
“Katie is such a breath of fresh air within the infant-sleep world - she deeply respects the biological need for nurture within the mother-baby dyad. Her approach is genuinely ‘holistic ’ - it’s not simply used as a buzzword. I felt she really assessed my family as a unique situation, and offered tailored, thoughtful, and very useful advice, rather than dishing out cookie cutter recommendations. I would definitely feel comfortable referring friends and family to her.”
Get in touch
Unsure which support option is right for you? Drop me an email to ask any questions you have about working together.
Questions?
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I will never suggest or recommend that you leave your baby or toddler to cry. I fully advocate for parents supporting their children to sleep in whatever way and for however long they desire to do so.
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Yes! I believe that most (if not all!) parents will end up sleeping with their baby at some point, whether intentionally or not. So I am a big believer in the value of learning how to safely co-sleep.
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In simple terms, Somatic coaching uses the body's natural wisdom instead of focusing on thoughts from the mind. It helps you become more aware of your physical feelings and emotions, making it easier to handle stress and reactions to different situations.
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I trained to become a Certified Holistic Infant Sleep Coach in 2024 with the amazing Fox and the Moon Academy.
I trained to become a Somatic Coach with The Somatic School in 2021.
I am also an NLP practitioner, Reiki Practitioner.
And the biggest qualification of all is the past 2 years of raising my little boy!
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I've got just the blog post for you! Read my toddler bedtime battles post.
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There are many different approaches you can take to gently move away from night weaning. Read more about gentle night weaning